Would You Survive a Westerosi Wedding?

How it works

Nine questions, four answers each, about an evening rather than about you directly — where you would sit, what you would drink, which person in the room you would keep half an eye on. The point of asking it sideways is that people answer honestly about a hall and dishonestly about themselves. The nine are pulled at random from a longer set, so the second run is a different evening.

Nothing you click is transmitted anywhere. The whole thing runs in the tab, which is why there is no waiting, no account, and no cookie notice — and why it will still work if you open it again with the network off.

The six ways the night can end

The First to Fall — you were having a lovely time, and that was the problem.
Out the Side Door — you left before the toasts, for a reason you could not have articulated.
Under the Table — not dignified. Alive, though, which is the metric being used here.
The One With the Knife — you were not surprised, because you were not meant to be.
The Musician Nobody Looked At — you were in the room all night and no one could describe you.
The Host Who Called It — you saw it coming an hour out and you still let the courses run.

Why the seating is the whole quiz

Almost everything that goes wrong at a large formal dinner is decided before anybody sits down: how many exits there are, who is between you and them, whether the people serving are the usual people, and whether the household guard is armed at an event where it normally would not be. A person who reads a room reads those things without meaning to, and a person who does not is having a much nicer evening right up until they are not. The questions here are built around that gap rather than around bravery, because bravery is very rarely the variable.

Sending it on

Your ending is packed into the page address as soon as you have one. Paste that link anywhere and it opens on the same verdict for whoever clicks — no account for them, nothing saved on either end. If a picture travels better where you are posting, there is a downloadable card too, drawn in the page itself.

This is fan-made, and unofficial

This quiz is about a notorious kind of evening in a fictional world. It is a free, unofficial fan quiz — an unofficial fan tribute, made for fun. It is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or connected to George R. R. Martin, HBO, or any official Game of Thrones property.

It describes no specific scene from any book or television series; every question, ending and line of it was written here. Iron Realms — the strategy game the rest of this site is about — is an original fantasy world with its own map, its own houses and its own art, and has no connection to Westeros. This corner is kept separate on purpose, and nothing in it should be read as suggesting otherwise.

Where the rest of them are

The companion piece is the one about how long you would last through a winter, which is the slow version of the same question. The Westeros — ASOIAF & Game of Thrones section lists every quiz and tool in this wing, and the fan tributes hub has the rest of the corner. If you would rather play something than answer questions, Iron Realms is free and runs in a browser tab.